As a nanny, difficult conversations are an inevitable part of your role. Avoiding these conversations can make issues grow and become even harder to address. Whether it’s with the children you care for, their parents, or other caregivers, having these conversations is crucial for maintaining a healthy and productive relationships. Here are some tips from our agency to help you navigate these challenging discussions effectively.
1. Do Your Homework
Before you start the conversation, identify exactly what the issue is. Ask yourself how this behaviour or issue is affecting your work and the family. Have clear and concise answers ready, as these will form the basis of your discussion.
2. Know How to Begin
Starting the conversation can be the hardest part. Use a direct approach. For instance, ” I’d like to talk with you about what happened during our last playdate. Can we chat after dinner tonight or when you get home?” This approach is respectful and sets the tone for a constructive discussion.
4. Give Bad News Upfront
Start with the issue at hand without cushioning it with unrelated compliments. This approach is direct and prevents confusion. It’s respectful to be straightforward.
5. Develop a Script and Plan for Questions
If the idea of a difficult conversation makes you anxious, prepare a rough script of what you want to say. Anticipate questions or reactions and plan your responses. This preparation can help you feel more confident.
6. Know Your Objective
What do you want to achieve with this conversation? Whether it’s a change in a child’s routine or addressing a concern with the parents, having a clear objective will guide your discussion and help you stay focused on finding a solution.
7. Avoid the Blame Game
Focus on resolving the issue rather than assigning blame. This approach fosters a collaborative environment and emphasizes problem-solving over fault-finding.
8. Control Emotions but Acknowledge Them
While it’s important to control your emotions, it’s also essential to acknowledge the feelings of others. Show empathy and understanding and avoid venting your frustrations.
9. Embrace Silence
Give the other person time to process what you’ve said. Silence can be powerful, allowing them to think and respond thoughtfully.
10. Acknowledge Their Feelings
If the other person becomes emotional, acknowledge their feelings. For example, “I understand this is upsetting, and I want to work together to find a solution.” This approach shows that you respect their emotions and are committed to resolving the issue.
11. Stay Confident and Purposeful
Remind yourself that conflict is a natural part of human interaction. Your goal is not to hurt or blame but to solve a problem and achieve the best outcome for everyone. Confidence in your purpose will help you navigate the conversation more effectively.
Handling difficult conversations is a skill that requires empathy, preparation, and courage. The more you practice, the better you will become. Remember, addressing issues directly and with kindness is the key to maintaining healthy relationships in your role as a nanny.
Remember most families are not experienced as Employers and as such may not be aware of the issues or challenges you are facing as a Nanny.
We love these 4 techniques from Mel Robbins – try using these techniques you need to have a difficult conversation to help you stay focused instead of getting hijacked by emotions.
1️ Always start the conversation by acknowledging your responsibility.
2. Define the outcome or goal you have for this conversation.
3️. Do A LOT of listening and validating the other person’s feelings.
4️ Restate the outcome.
Bonus tip: try rehearsing the conversation with a friend to get comfortable with what you’re going to say.
Or contact our Team – we’re always happy to provide advice or simply listen to our Nannies!
Listen to the full Video Here:
How To Have A Difficult Conversation | Mel Robbins
Let us know how you go with your next difficult conversation!